Death is inevitable, and so is our fondness for exorbitantly priced funerals. Today, the barbaric medieval pull carts of Monty Python fame have given way to a $15 billion industry. From the entombment of ancient Egyptian pharaohs to the modern hearse-and-casket service, we're all about sending off our loved ones in style.

The hottest funeral service in the U.S. is cremation. It's also one of the most popular. In California's Marin County, which has one of the highest per-capita incomes in the nation, 81 percent of funerals are cremations. However, cremation requires an expensive furnace and can emit harmful pollutants, which is why Susanne Wiigh-Masak of Sweden pioneered a similar, but more environmentally safe process. Using liquid nitrogen and vibration to disintegrate the body, her process turns loved ones into freeze-dried worm food.

If freeze-drying your remains sounds too much like wart removal, it is also possible to have human remains preserved in a natural reef system under the sea, courtesy of Eternal Reefs, Inc. Make up for a lifetime of littering by saving the planet in the eternal hereafter for the bargain price of $6,495. That includes a personal inscription for the fish to read while they're moving in.

A more portable post-mortem memorial alternative is provided by LifeGem. From your carbon remains, LifeGem can actually create a diamond. Prices for a memorial diamond range from just under $3,000 to nearly $20,000. It could be worth it for such a great conversation starter--what better way to meet people than to introduce them to your grandma's $20,000 handheld glittering gravestone?

For the scientifically adventurous, you may be able to entangle human DNA strands into the DNA structure of a tree. Don't worry, there haven't been any reports of trees growing legs or speaking, but your loved one's DNA could be sustained as a memorial within another living organism. For an estimated $35,000, a company called Biopresence performs the procedure--just make sure the neighborhood dogs don't mistake Uncle Joe for a fire hydrant.

Environmentally conscious individuals have often seen traditional burials as wasteful of both raw materials and usable real estate. Luckily, they can now undergo a "green" burial in a biodegradable box. The burial ground is often used to promote conservation, though its claim to fame doesn't usually bolster property values.

For those who always wanted to go out with a bang, incorporating your remains in a fireworks display is now an option. Heavens Above Fireworks has made it possible to launch a loved one into the night sky for a fiery display. And if fireworks don't cut it, Memorial Spaceflights offers packages ranging from under $500 to over $12,000 to launch a person's remains into Earth's orbit or the outermost recesses of space. This seems to send a mixed message: Sure, your loved ones deserve a proper send-off, but the outer reaches of the Milky Way seems just a bit excessive.

If you're a little overwhelmed, it might be time to turn to professional funeral planners. For a price, companies will help plan your funeral or the funeral of a loved one. If you're planning on having any one of these extravaganzas, you might be smart to use a professional--at least they can hold your hand as you write the check.
 

Sources: telegraph.co.uk; eternalreefs.com; lifegem.com; wired.com; heavensabovefireworks.com; smh.com.au; memorialspaceflights.com; everestfuneral.com; washingtontimes.com; bea.gov