Every relationship has a different strategy for handling finances. Here are some examples for any singles or couples looking to take the next step.
- My friends have been in a committed relationship for years now, and both parties keep their monies completely separate from each other: if one pays for dinner, the other cuts a check for their share later; if one can't afford their share of that month's rent, they owe the other extra next month. Finances are split 50/50 regardless of either partner's financial situation.
- My in-laws have joint accounts, but my mother-in-law has her own account and my father-in-law gets an allowance from the joint.
- My wife and I had our separate accounts for about three years while we were dating, opened a single joint savings account and kept our separate checking accounts while we were engaged, and finally merged all of our accounts into one joint checking account and one joint savings account once we married. Our philosophy is to support each other financially: her debt is my debt, our paychecks equal one. So we spend from the same accounts.
Obviously these are three extremes of how couples manage finances. The point is every relationship is different, so treat your finances in accordance. Take others' advice but ultimately do what's right for you and your partner. It's easy to confuse outside factors and statistics as absolute truths (after all, the U.S. divorce rate is high enough to scare any couple from joining their accounts), so take what you hear with a grain of salt and base your decisions on your own relationship. If it comes down to it, try different account equations until you find the right combination, but don't let the financial aspect take over everything else. As they say, there are more important things.
If you're worried about what might happen to your personal finances if a divorce or break up were to happen, look into a prenuptial agreement. Relationships are about trust, and there is no better way to establish it than through open and honest communication.
If you have advice--or examples of other couples' kooky money-sharing habits--post in the comments below.
--Chris
Photo taken from this photostream and used with permission of a Creative Commons license.
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